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3 years ago today, may 3rd 2023, i had my total hysterectomy, the final step of my medical transition as a transgender man. ITS STILL WILD TO ME that im done!! i was 22, right before my 23rd bday in june, and was only able to do this bc 1. still had some of my SSDI backpay savings 2. 12 month payment plan 3. medicare covered most of it since i was born w a bicornuate uterus + TONS of ovarian cysts since i was young + back when i had periods they would have killed me.
i have no savings now bc i spent it on surgeries and covering 75% of the down payment to get my family a house (we lived in a tiny shitty apartment after my stepdad made my mom go bankrupt). not to mention doctor and ER expenses over time bc my health is poor. but i dont regret it, even if im struggling financially now, i would have eventually run out of savings anyways bc of my health. Might as well use it first for me and my family!
(i dont live w my immediate family anymore tho, moved out of state a year ago in with close friends then my bf moved in w us)
anyways. lets see... i was an incredibly gender dysphoric toddler, despite being treated equal to my older brother as my dad was a HUGE feminist. i started socially transitioning age 12 when i learned that theres a word for me, "transgender". i started trying to get on testosterone when i was 16 (would have sooner but 14-15 i was dealing with my dads terminal cancer and death. Was a bit preoccupied). the ONLY gender clinic in texas interviewed me over the span of 6 months, then ghosted every single followup email and call for MONTHS. i told my endocrinologist who id had since i was a toddler, born with hypothyroidism and all, and she just said "you know i can prescribe you it, right?" so i started T shots age 17 a month after i legally changed my name to Ray.
after that, tried to get top surgery in the summer 2018, but our insurance was running out (we had insurance u get when the breadwinner dies for 3 years). i tried to do a gofundme, that failed horribly for 9 months. I got like.. $400 max. Prob less idr. i had to close it when i had a medical emergency, knowing i couldnt guarantee itd be saved for top surgery. applied for disability benefitd 2019, got approved 2021 (2 years is Very Fast. Extremely so. which sucks ass). first thing i did with the backpay was top surgery!! fast forward to late 2022, i had contacted so many places for hysterectomy for months, and it was always either "we dont take medicare" or "we dont accept trans people as patients". Awesome. but my mom needed one for polyps, and asked me to attend all her appointments (stepdad cant handle going to doctors, for fair reasons. but he still should lol). at the end of one, i asked the doctor if she could give me a hysterectomy, so we scheduled a consult! i had mine a few months after my mom recovered and we moved into our new house. WHICH MEANT I COMPLETED IT ALL!! YEAAAA
i was the gynecologist's first trans surgery patient— all her other trans patients were already done medically transitioning and were there fore family care. idm being the first for surgery, shes operated on plenty of cis women successfully. and it went well!! :D
—
fun fact: i learned the word transgender bc i was on tumblr in 2012, saw a post about the movie barnyard. on that post, a reblog said "shh dont let the cisgender cows hear you!" didnt know what cisgender meant so i looked it up. the definition made me go ?? there must be an opposite if they have to define this, right? so i found out what trans ppl are.. and immediately knee that was me from all the times id say "i wish i was a boy!" and feel so awful being seen as a girl.
so to conclude this. Thank you tumblr, and Otis the cow from barnyard! lmao. fr tho thank you to everyone who has ever supported me in my life, my transition, and friends and family who stick around <3
i have no savings now bc i spent it on surgeries and covering 75% of the down payment to get my family a house (we lived in a tiny shitty apartment after my stepdad made my mom go bankrupt). not to mention doctor and ER expenses over time bc my health is poor. but i dont regret it, even if im struggling financially now, i would have eventually run out of savings anyways bc of my health. Might as well use it first for me and my family!
(i dont live w my immediate family anymore tho, moved out of state a year ago in with close friends then my bf moved in w us)
anyways. lets see... i was an incredibly gender dysphoric toddler, despite being treated equal to my older brother as my dad was a HUGE feminist. i started socially transitioning age 12 when i learned that theres a word for me, "transgender". i started trying to get on testosterone when i was 16 (would have sooner but 14-15 i was dealing with my dads terminal cancer and death. Was a bit preoccupied). the ONLY gender clinic in texas interviewed me over the span of 6 months, then ghosted every single followup email and call for MONTHS. i told my endocrinologist who id had since i was a toddler, born with hypothyroidism and all, and she just said "you know i can prescribe you it, right?" so i started T shots age 17 a month after i legally changed my name to Ray.
after that, tried to get top surgery in the summer 2018, but our insurance was running out (we had insurance u get when the breadwinner dies for 3 years). i tried to do a gofundme, that failed horribly for 9 months. I got like.. $400 max. Prob less idr. i had to close it when i had a medical emergency, knowing i couldnt guarantee itd be saved for top surgery. applied for disability benefitd 2019, got approved 2021 (2 years is Very Fast. Extremely so. which sucks ass). first thing i did with the backpay was top surgery!! fast forward to late 2022, i had contacted so many places for hysterectomy for months, and it was always either "we dont take medicare" or "we dont accept trans people as patients". Awesome. but my mom needed one for polyps, and asked me to attend all her appointments (stepdad cant handle going to doctors, for fair reasons. but he still should lol). at the end of one, i asked the doctor if she could give me a hysterectomy, so we scheduled a consult! i had mine a few months after my mom recovered and we moved into our new house. WHICH MEANT I COMPLETED IT ALL!! YEAAAA
i was the gynecologist's first trans surgery patient— all her other trans patients were already done medically transitioning and were there fore family care. idm being the first for surgery, shes operated on plenty of cis women successfully. and it went well!! :D
—
fun fact: i learned the word transgender bc i was on tumblr in 2012, saw a post about the movie barnyard. on that post, a reblog said "shh dont let the cisgender cows hear you!" didnt know what cisgender meant so i looked it up. the definition made me go ?? there must be an opposite if they have to define this, right? so i found out what trans ppl are.. and immediately knee that was me from all the times id say "i wish i was a boy!" and feel so awful being seen as a girl.
so to conclude this. Thank you tumblr, and Otis the cow from barnyard! lmao. fr tho thank you to everyone who has ever supported me in my life, my transition, and friends and family who stick around <3
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